Dealings and Attitudes with In-Laws | Sheikh Assim Al Hakeem
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Dealings and Attitudes with In-Laws

QUESTION: Can my husbands sister in law(brothers wife) who doesnt cover herself talk with him about the problems she has with her husband and needs solution.where they dont prefer me to be present.She believes that nobody could solve it except my husband

Dealings and Attitudes with In-Laws
29 May

ANSWER: This is absolutely prohibited as this is seclusion and it is haram

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QUESTION: Can a husband refuse to provide his wife with a separate kitchen, room, and washroom for privacy on the basis that her family knew at marriage that he was living with his mother, even though he lives in a double-storey one-kanal house (owned by his mother)? He argues that privacy is met with only a separate room and washroom, without a separate kitchen. Is this justified in Islam?

Dealings and Attitudes with In-Laws, Fiqh of Marriage
23 May

ANSWER: No, she has the right to have her own bedroom, washroom and her own separate kitchen. She is not obliged to meet any of his family members, let alone serve them!

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QUESTION: My husband shares most daily personal details of our married life with his parents and siblings, and he says it is because they care and want to be involved. Is this Islamically appropriate, or should some level of privacy be maintained between spouses?

Backbiting, Dealings and Attitudes with In-Laws
02 May

ANSWER: This is backbiting, one of the major sins in Islam and he is sinful for this. He needs to stop being a mommy’s boy. 

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QUESTION: Do I have to visit my husband’s non-Muslim family when they invite us (including uncles, cousins, etc.)? I don’t feel comfortable there, especially when it’s so crowded. But I wonder if I should go for the sake of Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala and for my child, or if Allah would be displeased if I don’t go, since it’s my husbands family. What is your advice?

Dealings and Attitudes with In-Laws, Mahram
24 Jan

ANSWER: If there is free mixing, this is totally prohibited even if they are Muslims.

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QUESTION: I have an interview next month. My in-laws say that I should not wear an abaya to the interview because they think this country is racist. However, I am not comfortable without wearing an abaya, but they keep insisting. What should I do?

Dealings and Attitudes with In-Laws, Halal/Haram Matters
21 Jan

ANSWER: They have no right in dictating things to you, especially when its going against Islamic rulings! Do not obey them!

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QUESTION: My divorced sister in law lives with us and she is quite older than me. She doesn’t talk to me neither say Salam to me. Is it obligatory on me to always say Salam to her let alone serve her despite her cold attitude towards me ? Will Allah forgive me if I keep a distance with her as she does with me ?

Dealings and Attitudes with In-Laws
14 Dec

ANSWER: You’re not obliged to maintain ties with her as she’s not your kinship.  You should say salam whenever you see her and you are not obliged to serve her.

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QUESTION: I live in my fathers home with my wife and intend to move out in the next couple of years. my father wants my wife to inform him before leaving the house, but my wife doesnt like that and says she will inform me only So i politely refused my fathers request. However my father is angry at me. am i sinful for not fulfilling demands of my father

Dealings and Attitudes with In-Laws, Kind Treatment of Spouses
30 Nov

ANSWER: Your father has no right, NONE WHATSOEVER on your wife or what she does and where she goes etc as long as she has your consent.

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QUESTION: Every day when my husband returns from the office, his nother, his wife, and his daughter stand He first hugs his mother warmly,and love her then calls our daughter . He only says salam to me and goes upstairs. I wish he would meet me lovingly too, but in our culture it feels awkward. What is the Islamic guidance? Please advise how I should address this matter kindly and wisely”

Dealings and Attitudes with In-Laws, Fiqh of Marriage
25 Nov

ANSWER: This is quite childish of you!  Ask yourself these questions: do you doubt that he loves you? Isn’t there a possibility that his mother might feel a bit jealous of you and this is why he is trying to avoid Satan from coming in the house, as it seems he is already in the […]

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QUESTION: Is this hadees authentic. Question: Taking care of parents and taking care of in laws can give Jannah if they are unhappy you will go to jahannum. ( Even if in laws are abusive).

Dealings and Attitudes with In-Laws
24 Sep

ANSWER: This is not true  A woman is not obliged to serve or take care of her in laws and this is not her job or duty

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QUESTION: Me and my wife are living in a joint family with my parents. They are very nice to her but very restrictive. We need their permission for things like going out or visiting my wifes parents etc. We want to live seperately but I cannot tell my parents this because they will get offended. Can I lie to them and tell that i got a job in a different state and would have to move there along with my wife.

Dealings and Attitudes with In-Laws, Kind Treatment of Spouses
13 Sep

ANSWER: You must not lie as this is haram in Islam.  Try to get a real job and relocate and this way you won’t need to lie

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