The sacrifice can be one sheep or goat for the whole of the household living under one roof and eating from the same kitchen. One can also include the deceased of his family in it. However, it is an innovation to include the Prophet salla allahu alaihi wa sallam in it.

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The Sunnah is to fast all 9 days. If you cannot than you can fast as many days as you want.

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The one sacrificing must be one of them. In her case, the money she is giving is a contribution and a gift to her husband. Therefore, it is her husband who is giving the sacrifice and not her. She doesn’t have to refrain from these things.

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One has to wish and ask for that but in the end is Allah’s will. However, to deliberately stop having them, this is not permissible.

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