What you are suffering from is weakness of Iman and you must try to boost that. This is done through offering more righteous deeds, attending more lectures and circles of knowledge and also by surrounding yourself with true practicing brothers.

The Prophet salla Allahu alaihi wa sallam has told us that a wolf would only attach a stray sheep that wonders away from the herd.

You are that sheep and Satan is the wolf.

By staying with the brothers at all times, you minimize Satan’s influence over you.

This is a serious thing and you have to work in building up your Iman before it is too late. And Allah knows best

I have on many occasions tried to change myself to be a better Muslim but reverted back to my bad ways, I sometimes miss prayers, and I don’t feel bad about it because I find them a burden. I feel ashamed about certain things in the religion like keeping a long beard, I also find some matters in the religion difficult to come to terms with, consequence of growing in a non Muslim country, I get a lot of doubts and this really scares me because i fear i will die in a state of kufr and I don’t feel remorse for my sins. However on this occasion I have been steadfast for a longer period, the one thing I’m doing different is reading the Quran daily and I remember Allah frequently. There is something missing but not quite sure what it is, there is more I could add but believe you will get the picture. What should I do?