There are rights to your mother and rights to your wife! You must not mix the two!
Your mother has no rights over your wife and she has no right to scold her or to control her! You have no right in sending her back to live with your mother! If she is not going to live with you, she might as well go and live with her parents! Your mother has no right in preventing your wife from going out with you to a Resturant or for a vacation and you must not obey your mother in such oppressive demands!